Little Girl, Young Lady

We've been preparing for this for over a year now, since the first subtle physical changes. I've been dreading it's arrival. She has been anxious wondering what the fuss is all about. We played out all of the possible scenarios to reassure her that no matter how, when, or where...she would be just fine. We attendend a workshop at the hospital and recently, the entire 5th grade classroom watched gender-specific videos. And after a year of anticipation, it happened in the comfort of our home while I was starting dinner in the next room. Neither of us panicked. Everything was at hand. And within a few minutes, our worlds went back to normal...somewhat. For the next few hours, I stared at her just a little bit longer. I fingered a loop of her hair. And I allowed my heart to walk down memory lane. My little girl was now a young lady. (sniff)

Then and Now

When I was a little girl, I always thought that if I had enough money, I could change the world...or at least my world. Over the years, I have finally come to the realization that I will never have "enough" money to change my world. All of those material things that I thought I would need when I grew up, no longer have the same meaning. I wanted a sports car, a beaming red Mazda Miata. I drive a dust-covered mini-van, no CD player, broken heater motor/air conditioner. But the sports car that I dreamed of so long ago, could never do for me what this beat-up ol' grocery-getter does on a daily basis. It's the vehicle that I love to hate and hate to love. But it's paid in full, allows each of the girls their own personal space without the "she's touching me", and can load an entire team--ball bags and all. I wanted a huge house with at least 5 bedrooms, 3 baths, swimming pool, and acreage. I can barely keep our 3 bedroom/2 bath clean and can't even imagine how much time it would take to clean a larger home without hired help. What we have now is not immaculate or spotless. It is lived in, worn in some places, but cozy and comfortable and quite well kept in comparison to some. We even hosted a 25-person Christmas gathering this year without any complaints and plenty of room for food, socializing, and gift-opening games. I wanted Prince Charming, 5 beautiful well-behaved boys, and a small dog. I've since decided that a dog is the last thing I desire (pet hair, expenses, smell, and having to worry about another "kid"). God granted me 3 beautiful, amazing, and talented daughters that give me reasons to be proud and grateful daily. And because of those lovely girls, we will surely have plenty of boys around the house in the years to come. As for Prince Charming...well, I did manage to nail that one.